Crosswalk Couples Devotionals: Is Marriage Counseling Worth It?

　　By: Vivian Bricker

　　"Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed."(Proverbs 15:22)

　　Once a couple is married, they might hear many friends and family members tell them about marriage counseling. While many people believe marriage counseling is only when your marriage is struggling, marriage counseling can be helpful regardless of the season you are going through. Similar to how regular counseling is beneficial to those who are not experiencing any issues, marriage counseling is also beneficial to couples even if they are not having problems.

　　The goal of marriage counseling is to prevent bad things from happening in the future. By having a safe space to talk about your feelings, you and your spouse can work through any issues, thoughts, or emotions with the help of a trained therapist. While it can be difficult to share your feelings with a stranger initially, it can become easier as you spend more time with your therapist. Maybe you are already seeing a therapist for other things and have seen how you have warmed up to them.

　　Remember that this same effect will happen with your marriage counselor. Give him or her some time as you share your feelings and discuss what is going on in your marriage. Even if there is not one problem at present, your therapist will be able to help you work through any problems that could arise.

　　Marriage counseling can also help you and your spouse grow closer together. By building communication skills and working through problems together, you will see your marriage will become stronger. You might even be surprised at the different things you learn about your spouse. For example, you might learn things about their childhood or early years that you didn't know about before. After therapy, feel free to continue any conversations with your spouse, as it could help your bond grow even closer.

　　When picking a therapist, I suggest you pray over it. Don't choose the first therapist who shows up online. Do some research and wait on the Lord. As you wait for Jesus to direct you to the correct therapist, talk matters over with your spouse and ask for their advice, too. Together, with the Lord's help, you will be able to find the right therapist for you and your spouse.

　　Getting help from a counselor shows your desire to improve your marriage and work through any issue. The Bible tells us that it is important to seek the advice of others, "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed" (Proverbs 15:22). As the writer of Proverbs tells us, our plans will fail if we do not consult others. However, if we have many advisers, our plans will succeed.

　　Therefore, from a marriage standpoint, we need to seek out a therapist. A therapist can provide us with counsel. In addition to working with a therapist, we can also seek out advisers in our parents, siblings, and trusted friends. All of these individuals can help us in our marriage and provide us with new insights. Sadly, many people believe asking for help is weak, but it is not.

　　Reaching out for help will ensure your marriage stays strong. Don't wait until times get rough. Choose to start praying today, talk with trusted people in your life for their advice, and, with your spouse's help, look for a few options for therapists. The Lord will point you to the best fit. Sometimes, it might take a few sessions before you can tell if the therapist is the right fit, but lean on Jesus and allow Him to direct you.

　　Jesus is faithful, and He will strengthen your marriage through counseling. He will be with you every step of the way and help you incorporate new teachings you learn in counseling into your life. As the years go by, you will see how much Jesus has been involved in your sessions and His loving hand in your life.

　　Prayer:

　　"Dear Jesus, sometimes I wonder if marriage counseling is worth it. Sometimes, it feels as though it will take too much time and not provide any help. Thank You for showing me that marriage counseling is worth it. Please walk with my spouse and me as we go through therapy and also help us to find the right therapist. In Your Name, I pray, Amen."

　　Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Giuseppe LombardoVivian Bricker obtained a Bachelor of Arts in Ministry, followed by a Master of Arts with an emphasis in theology. She loves all things theology, mission work, and helping others learn about Jesus. Find more of her content at Cultivate:https://cultivatechristianity.wordpress.com/.

　　Related Resource: Engaging with God in a Technology-Saturated WorldMany of us feel hurried, and hurry is costing us more than we realize. The Unhurried Living Podcast with Alan and Gem Fadling provides resources and training to help Christian leaders learn to live and lead from fullness rather than on empty. After realizing the toll technology had taken on his connection with God, his community, and even himself, Carlos Whitaker took radical steps to disconnect in order to reconnect. He spent nearly two months living screen-free at a monastery, an Amish farm, and his own home, experiencing profound transformation along the way. If this episode helps you recenter your work and life on God, be sure to subscribe to Unhurried Living on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode!